We started talking about names of potential future kids early on in our relationship the way you do when you're young and with someone new. We had decided early on if we had a little girl she'd be Serenity Wysteria. The moment I got pregnant I lost all love for that name. I chalk it up to an instinct that this baby just wouldn't be suited to it.
So, it was back to square one with girl names which I figured would be fun because there are so many options. We switched gears and discussed boy names at that point and Megatron Batman was our favorite to joke about, but never actually a practical option. We liked Simon Oliver, but I hit on Maverick and that was that. We were completely sold. I used to drive home from work picturing my little Maverick and I could see him so clearly. I think I was in love with him even then. I liked the name because it's different and sounds strong, but most importantly because it means "fiercely independent." It came to mean that because there was a cattle rancher with that surname who refused to brand his cattle. Cool stuff. With that decided it was back to girl names...
I threw out hundreds of ideas which were dismissed out of hand like Gracie or Lucy. Michael had negative associations with or just found most of my ideas ugly. I remembered that once I had looked up the meaning of my sister's name, Jessie, and found an alternative suggestion was the name Jessalyn. I always thought that was beautiful and very feminine. It still means "gift from god or woman of wealth" depending on whether you go with Greek or Latin. Mike liked it too and from our mutual love of Greek Mythology we decided Eris, the goddess of discord, would make a beautiful middle name for Jessalyn. I can just imagine our beautiful sneaky little Jessalyn Eris. It was great, but maybe not the one. I had been talking about my little fairy baby and Mike found the name Aerilyn which means "beautiful air" and sounded like a consort of Maab, queen of the fairies, to me. Middle names were tricky on that one Eris certainly wouldn't do. We then discovered that Sapphire not only refers to the blue gem stone, but also means "of Saturn" the Greek god of earth. So she would be beautiful air belonging to the earth. I just worry that people would forever say you mean Carolyn or Marilyn? So, one day I happened to mention my friend had a daughter named Riley and to my great surprise Mike said "I like that." So I looked it up and Riley very literally means "a clearing in the rye", but also means "courageous woman." Now I loved it, but again Eris wasn't the best choice for middle name and I came across another friend with a child named Grey and thought Riley Grey was really nice. I like what we had so far, but kept searching and it turns out we both like Violet and thought maybe Violet Eris or Violet Wyllow would be pretty.
Family and friends are pretty evenly divided between Riley and Jessalyn for the most part and I have some minor issues with both. I don't mind my daughter's name being similar to my sister's but don't really want anyone to think that's why I picked it. Also Jessalyn is so unique and pretty and everyone would call her Jess or Jessie. The issue with Riley is it becoming more and more common. So, the other night Mike suggested Rylyn, which I love because it's a compromise between the two. Pretty and different and not so likely to be shortened. There was just one problem there Rylyn doesn't go with our last name at all. No good. Bummer.
Also adding to the problem of committing is that Mike insists we see her first and then decide. He claims that's what they did with Isaac. Well, it makes me nervous that we'll see her and still won't know. Our friend said when her son was born they had narrowed it down to a few names and none of them seemed right. They decided to take him home and think about it. The nurse however would not let them leave without a name on the birth certificate. They didn't know what to do and while they were thinking about it her husband pointed out that he had a crooked nose. So, Cameron had a name, Cameron means crooked nose. It really does suit him. It's such a great story.
The other thing I don't like about waiting is I don't know what to call her. She, her, baby, little one, pumpkin all work, but I want her to have an identity. It just seems so important to make sure it's the right name that suits her personality, has a good meaning and looks and sounds good. Hopefully we'll find "the one" soon.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Going Home Outfit
My yet unnamed little pumpkin probably won't actually be an October baby, but it will still be fall so I wanted something festive to bring her home in. Here's what I picked, the ruffles are on the butt side I just turned it around so you could see them.
Isn't it cute?
Isn't it cute?
Monday, July 27, 2009
29 Week Appointment
So, I had to fast after midnight last night. That's right 7 months pregnant and no breakfast. I had 5 minutes to drink a large cup of what tasted like very flat orange soda and then in an hour later they would draw my blood to see if my body was breaking down sugar correctly. Yippee!
Most of the hour was taken up by my exam. We discussed the contractions I'd had while on the anti-contractions meds. The OB double checked my cervix and told me the baby's head was really low. I guess she's already assuming the position. My meds stay the same which is a bummer, but I was most afraid of an increased dose. Also, bed rest continues at least until 34wks (that's 5wks from now), but there is a good chance I'll stay on it until I deliver. She did give me the okay for short trips out of the house under very specific circumstances so that's something.
Today was also the day for signing the consent for my tubal ligation. Apparently they're required to try and talk you out of it if you’re under 30 especially if this is your first baby. 25-28yr olds have a high rate of tubal regret. However, I'd done my research and considered my options so I listened to her speech and signed the form with no hesitation. It's a real relief to have that done. The other thing I was hoping would happen was that I'd get my c-section date, but that we have to wait 2 weeks. So, there's that to look forward to.
After the exam I had 30min to kill before they could draw my blood to complete the gestational diabetes test. I was incredibly nauseous at that point and worried I was going to loose it in the last 5min and have to repeat the test. I made it though, just barely. After the blood draw I was too dizzy to stand and the hot nauseous feeling over took me. I guess that's why they say not to give blood on an empty stomach. I thought ahead enough to bring snacks for as soon as the test was over so I popped some crackers and breathed a sigh of relief. It'll be two weeks until I hear the results.
Most of the hour was taken up by my exam. We discussed the contractions I'd had while on the anti-contractions meds. The OB double checked my cervix and told me the baby's head was really low. I guess she's already assuming the position. My meds stay the same which is a bummer, but I was most afraid of an increased dose. Also, bed rest continues at least until 34wks (that's 5wks from now), but there is a good chance I'll stay on it until I deliver. She did give me the okay for short trips out of the house under very specific circumstances so that's something.
Today was also the day for signing the consent for my tubal ligation. Apparently they're required to try and talk you out of it if you’re under 30 especially if this is your first baby. 25-28yr olds have a high rate of tubal regret. However, I'd done my research and considered my options so I listened to her speech and signed the form with no hesitation. It's a real relief to have that done. The other thing I was hoping would happen was that I'd get my c-section date, but that we have to wait 2 weeks. So, there's that to look forward to.
After the exam I had 30min to kill before they could draw my blood to complete the gestational diabetes test. I was incredibly nauseous at that point and worried I was going to loose it in the last 5min and have to repeat the test. I made it though, just barely. After the blood draw I was too dizzy to stand and the hot nauseous feeling over took me. I guess that's why they say not to give blood on an empty stomach. I thought ahead enough to bring snacks for as soon as the test was over so I popped some crackers and breathed a sigh of relief. It'll be two weeks until I hear the results.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Old Wives Tales
I'm not very superstitious, but I love hearing the root of all those silly age old beliefs. When it comes to babies and their gender there's a ton of them.
For example, they used to believe that one ovary released male eggs and the other released female ones so you should lay on your left to conceive a girl. Funny when you consider the age old beliefs about good and evil as they relate to left and right. Even in relatively modern times there are theatres where the hero always enters stage right and the villain stage left. Apparently, the Latin word for left is the same as the word for unlucky. The poor, fairer sex I guess. They also say that if you put a wooden spoon under the bed you'll conceive a girl. Not sure where that gets its roots perhaps it's something to do with the feminine traditionally being connected to the domestic. They also say putting a pink ribbon under your pillow will do the trick. I think it’s just a physical symbol of your wish.
Once the baby has been conceived there are supposed to be tell tale signs you're carrying a girl. The idea that you carry low for a boy and high for a girl or that girl babies rob their mothers of their beauty are some of the sillier ones I've heard. Obviously, how the baby sits has everything to do with the baby's size, how your uterus sits to begin with and your body type. There's also the massively popular belief that girls heart rates are above 140 and boys are below. Nothing to that one, babies' heart rates are as individual and effected by various stimuli as adults are. A baby girl's heart rate is usually faster than a boy's, but only after the onset of labor. They also say women carrying boys crave salty foods and women carrying girls crave sweets. This one makes me think of the nursery rhyme "sugar and spice and everything nice, that's what little girls are made of." The truth is a pregnant woman's appetite and cravings are very changeable and no basis for gender guessing.
Now there are some they may have a basis in fact. Like the idea that women carrying girls have a worse time with morning sickness. While hormone regulation is very unique thing from woman to woman there is some truth to the idea that all the excess estrogen makes you extra queasy. I found that one to be pretty apt. There's also the idea that if you're carrying a girl your partner will gain weight with you. Now, Mike started putting it on long before I got pregnant, but he had a significant increase in appetite during the beginning of my pregnancy. Estrogen again, apparently it's released somehow and according to some pregnant ladies causes their husbands to experience pregnancy symptoms. It's also possible it's just new daddy stress.
For example, they used to believe that one ovary released male eggs and the other released female ones so you should lay on your left to conceive a girl. Funny when you consider the age old beliefs about good and evil as they relate to left and right. Even in relatively modern times there are theatres where the hero always enters stage right and the villain stage left. Apparently, the Latin word for left is the same as the word for unlucky. The poor, fairer sex I guess. They also say that if you put a wooden spoon under the bed you'll conceive a girl. Not sure where that gets its roots perhaps it's something to do with the feminine traditionally being connected to the domestic. They also say putting a pink ribbon under your pillow will do the trick. I think it’s just a physical symbol of your wish.
Once the baby has been conceived there are supposed to be tell tale signs you're carrying a girl. The idea that you carry low for a boy and high for a girl or that girl babies rob their mothers of their beauty are some of the sillier ones I've heard. Obviously, how the baby sits has everything to do with the baby's size, how your uterus sits to begin with and your body type. There's also the massively popular belief that girls heart rates are above 140 and boys are below. Nothing to that one, babies' heart rates are as individual and effected by various stimuli as adults are. A baby girl's heart rate is usually faster than a boy's, but only after the onset of labor. They also say women carrying boys crave salty foods and women carrying girls crave sweets. This one makes me think of the nursery rhyme "sugar and spice and everything nice, that's what little girls are made of." The truth is a pregnant woman's appetite and cravings are very changeable and no basis for gender guessing.
Now there are some they may have a basis in fact. Like the idea that women carrying girls have a worse time with morning sickness. While hormone regulation is very unique thing from woman to woman there is some truth to the idea that all the excess estrogen makes you extra queasy. I found that one to be pretty apt. There's also the idea that if you're carrying a girl your partner will gain weight with you. Now, Mike started putting it on long before I got pregnant, but he had a significant increase in appetite during the beginning of my pregnancy. Estrogen again, apparently it's released somehow and according to some pregnant ladies causes their husbands to experience pregnancy symptoms. It's also possible it's just new daddy stress.
A Much Needed Bed Rest Vent
I am not going to spend a paragraph apologizing for my feelings, that's all they are my very valid emotional response to a difficult situation. I am not mad at anyone or trying to solicit sympathy. I need to write it out and hopefully let go of some of it and maybe someone will find themselves here and take comfort in remembering that someone else felt this way.
I was doing pretty well with being confined to bed for a while, but at some point after the baby shower I realized that although I could make a list of baby stuff left to get I couldn't go spend the gift cards to get those items. That was the first moment leaving the house seemed so important and I wished, as prepared as I was, that I'd done more sooner. I mean, am I supposed to just send Michael to Target with a list and hope he doesn't get frustrated and give up on his least favorite task? Especially when it was something I was so looking forward to. I have no answer.
The list of things I was looking forward to goes on and on...free professional maternity photos, my best friend's wedding and bridal shower, the tour of the maternity ward, taking Isaac to his first day of first grade, a trip somewhere with just Michael and I before the baby (or even an evening or two to ourselves), The Time Traveler's Wife coming to theaters, and paying off my car. It's overwhelmingly depressing. Michael keeps pointing out the once or twice I got up and did the dishes, etc and then had contractions later. Where I agree the physical labor of housework was a mistake how can sitting calmly in the car, enjoying some good company and coming back home to bed so terrible?
This weekend was the worst by far. I was supposed to have a visitor on Saturday. I was really looking forward to it all week and in the end she couldn't make it at the last minute. Ordinarily, I'd reschedule and move on with life, but I couldn't see straight I was so disappointed. It was like all my hope of getting through this with my mind in tact left me. On top of that I waited months for my amazing birthday present of an adult night out to see a play. I can count the number of dates Michael I have been on since we've been together on one hand. I'd been insisting since I got pregnant that we take a trip just the two of us (or get someone to watch Isaac for a night or two) before the baby and it never happened. Now even if we get alone time we can’t really take advantage of it. Bed rest is not very romantic. I know if we can't find time to go out as a couple now and then with a 6yr old it will never happen with a newborn. I knew we'd have obstacles because Michael has Isaac, but I didn't think we'd have so little time alone. I can't imagine the next 18yrs being this way. I was so looking forward to our night out this weekend especially since I haven't done or even seen live theater since I came to Florida. I didn't think the reality of it would hurt so badly. In the end it represented all the things I've given up to be here, all the parts of my life before I miss desperately and all the things about my immediate and distant future that scare me.
On top of everything else I am a few short months from owning the car I've been making payments on for 4yrs and I'm behind. I explained that I was on bed rest and waiting for SSI payments. You would think in this economy they'd rather cut me some slack than repossess my car. I made several phone calls and had worked out a deal that would lower my payments and give until the end of August to make the next payment. I was so relieved and then they called again and said without a payment they couldn't promise my car wouldn't get repossessed before then. What the hell? I demanded a supervisor and explained what I had been told 48hrs earlier. She was all apologies and cut the requested payment in half, but I still don't have it. No matter what some people think, I am about to have a baby I have to be able to get around while Michael's working. I am not physically capable of schlepping two kids on and off the bus and hiking from bus stops. Beyond that we're talking about the last piece of my life before. It’s my first car and I got it with no help and paid on it for 4yrs I can't handle the idea of loosing it. What more can I do from bed?
How much of me will it have cost in the end? I believe in my baby, she's strong. I don't want to be a weak, broken emotional disaster when she comes into the world. I want to go somewhere, talk to someone, fix things, prepare and I can't even go into the kitchen. Please don't misunderstand, I know it will be ok. It has to be, but I've always done everything myself and to be completely dependent on others is a very sole crushing feeling.
Maybe the answers will all be clear tomorrow, but for today it's all questions.
I was doing pretty well with being confined to bed for a while, but at some point after the baby shower I realized that although I could make a list of baby stuff left to get I couldn't go spend the gift cards to get those items. That was the first moment leaving the house seemed so important and I wished, as prepared as I was, that I'd done more sooner. I mean, am I supposed to just send Michael to Target with a list and hope he doesn't get frustrated and give up on his least favorite task? Especially when it was something I was so looking forward to. I have no answer.
The list of things I was looking forward to goes on and on...free professional maternity photos, my best friend's wedding and bridal shower, the tour of the maternity ward, taking Isaac to his first day of first grade, a trip somewhere with just Michael and I before the baby (or even an evening or two to ourselves), The Time Traveler's Wife coming to theaters, and paying off my car. It's overwhelmingly depressing. Michael keeps pointing out the once or twice I got up and did the dishes, etc and then had contractions later. Where I agree the physical labor of housework was a mistake how can sitting calmly in the car, enjoying some good company and coming back home to bed so terrible?
This weekend was the worst by far. I was supposed to have a visitor on Saturday. I was really looking forward to it all week and in the end she couldn't make it at the last minute. Ordinarily, I'd reschedule and move on with life, but I couldn't see straight I was so disappointed. It was like all my hope of getting through this with my mind in tact left me. On top of that I waited months for my amazing birthday present of an adult night out to see a play. I can count the number of dates Michael I have been on since we've been together on one hand. I'd been insisting since I got pregnant that we take a trip just the two of us (or get someone to watch Isaac for a night or two) before the baby and it never happened. Now even if we get alone time we can’t really take advantage of it. Bed rest is not very romantic. I know if we can't find time to go out as a couple now and then with a 6yr old it will never happen with a newborn. I knew we'd have obstacles because Michael has Isaac, but I didn't think we'd have so little time alone. I can't imagine the next 18yrs being this way. I was so looking forward to our night out this weekend especially since I haven't done or even seen live theater since I came to Florida. I didn't think the reality of it would hurt so badly. In the end it represented all the things I've given up to be here, all the parts of my life before I miss desperately and all the things about my immediate and distant future that scare me.
On top of everything else I am a few short months from owning the car I've been making payments on for 4yrs and I'm behind. I explained that I was on bed rest and waiting for SSI payments. You would think in this economy they'd rather cut me some slack than repossess my car. I made several phone calls and had worked out a deal that would lower my payments and give until the end of August to make the next payment. I was so relieved and then they called again and said without a payment they couldn't promise my car wouldn't get repossessed before then. What the hell? I demanded a supervisor and explained what I had been told 48hrs earlier. She was all apologies and cut the requested payment in half, but I still don't have it. No matter what some people think, I am about to have a baby I have to be able to get around while Michael's working. I am not physically capable of schlepping two kids on and off the bus and hiking from bus stops. Beyond that we're talking about the last piece of my life before. It’s my first car and I got it with no help and paid on it for 4yrs I can't handle the idea of loosing it. What more can I do from bed?
How much of me will it have cost in the end? I believe in my baby, she's strong. I don't want to be a weak, broken emotional disaster when she comes into the world. I want to go somewhere, talk to someone, fix things, prepare and I can't even go into the kitchen. Please don't misunderstand, I know it will be ok. It has to be, but I've always done everything myself and to be completely dependent on others is a very sole crushing feeling.
Maybe the answers will all be clear tomorrow, but for today it's all questions.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
More Than One Way to Say it
There's so many slang terms and phrases for being pregnant I'd thought just for fun I'd explore them.
1.Knocked up-this is probably my least favorite, but totally obvious. Although it does sound, if taken literally, like you've been beaten up when you think about it.
2.Bun in the Oven-oven=womb, easy enough.
3.The rabbit died-this is a rather out-dated one, but very interesting. It has to do with the way they used to test for pregnancy in the time before First Response. In the late 1920's HCG, the pregnancy hormone, was discovered. Doctors would take a urine sample and inject into a rabbit and wait for "results", poor bunnies.
4.In the family way-speaks for itself in a lame pregnancy and sex aren't spoken about 1950's kind of way.
5.Her eggo is peggo-pithy little rhyming quote from the movie "Juno."
6.Up the duff (or in the pudding club)-this is another old one. Apparently duff is a pudding and was at some point slang for semen.
7.With Child-um, duh.
8.Expecting-duh, again
9.Wearing her apron high-sounds like another 50's housewife who's not one to gossip, but...to me
10.Incubating/gestating-very literal
11.Harboring a uterine parasite-a modern idea of "funny"
12.Tin roof rusted-yup, apparently that line from "Love Shack" by the B-52's means pregnant.
13.Eating for two-this one is one of the most fun to say to people when you're on the smaller side.
14.On stork watch-like mother animals in Disney movies!
15.Up the spout-sounds like a take off of "up the duff" to me. Apparently it's a British expression for ruined
16.Trout in the well-they do flop around like fish in there, but I have no further explanation.
17.Preggolicious-a vivid indication that pop culture is retarded.
18.Preggers-popular with the people determined to further the disintegration of the English language. OMG it's easier to text "mom I'm preggers." than type it all out, kwim?
19.Keith Cheggars-this is cockney slang for pregnant. It's based on rhyme (like for those of you who saw Oceans Eleven-"we're in Barney. Rubble. Trouble."). Cheggers rhymes with preggers.
20.Pulling the goalie-it is what it sounds like, to stop using birth control.
Way to go me (and Google) I was hoping to make an even 20! I hope everyone learned a little something or at least had a good laugh, I know I did.
1.Knocked up-this is probably my least favorite, but totally obvious. Although it does sound, if taken literally, like you've been beaten up when you think about it.
2.Bun in the Oven-oven=womb, easy enough.
3.The rabbit died-this is a rather out-dated one, but very interesting. It has to do with the way they used to test for pregnancy in the time before First Response. In the late 1920's HCG, the pregnancy hormone, was discovered. Doctors would take a urine sample and inject into a rabbit and wait for "results", poor bunnies.
4.In the family way-speaks for itself in a lame pregnancy and sex aren't spoken about 1950's kind of way.
5.Her eggo is peggo-pithy little rhyming quote from the movie "Juno."
6.Up the duff (or in the pudding club)-this is another old one. Apparently duff is a pudding and was at some point slang for semen.
7.With Child-um, duh.
8.Expecting-duh, again
9.Wearing her apron high-sounds like another 50's housewife who's not one to gossip, but...to me
10.Incubating/gestating-very literal
11.Harboring a uterine parasite-a modern idea of "funny"
12.Tin roof rusted-yup, apparently that line from "Love Shack" by the B-52's means pregnant.
13.Eating for two-this one is one of the most fun to say to people when you're on the smaller side.
14.On stork watch-like mother animals in Disney movies!
15.Up the spout-sounds like a take off of "up the duff" to me. Apparently it's a British expression for ruined
16.Trout in the well-they do flop around like fish in there, but I have no further explanation.
17.Preggolicious-a vivid indication that pop culture is retarded.
18.Preggers-popular with the people determined to further the disintegration of the English language. OMG it's easier to text "mom I'm preggers." than type it all out, kwim?
19.Keith Cheggars-this is cockney slang for pregnant. It's based on rhyme (like for those of you who saw Oceans Eleven-"we're in Barney. Rubble. Trouble."). Cheggers rhymes with preggers.
20.Pulling the goalie-it is what it sounds like, to stop using birth control.
Way to go me (and Google) I was hoping to make an even 20! I hope everyone learned a little something or at least had a good laugh, I know I did.
It's A Girl
I don't know if I've mentioned this yet, but waaaaaaaaaay back in, probably, November Isaac was sitting at the dining room table eating his cereal and out of nowhere he said "Katie has to stay in bed because she's growing a baby." Michael and I were stunned and then Michael asked him if he had a dream and he said "yeah." Then Michael added "was it a girl baby or a boy baby?" and very matter-of-factly Isaac replied "a girl" (in a tone which implied this was common knowledge). Michael grinned ear to ear at this and I replied "don't even think about it." Of course I forgot all about the incident until a few months into my pregnancy and then I started to wonder if he knew something I didn't.
When Michael and I were first exploring the idea of a relationship (and I was trying to wrap my head around him having a child already) I asked if he wanted anymore kids. At that point his answer of "probably not" was met with relief on my end. After we'd been together a while we discussed the remote possibility of someday after we got married maybe having a baby Michael had said "I want us to have a little girl and I want her to look just like you."
We actually had two ultrasounds during the time when you can tell the gender, one at the doctor's office and a private one. The one at the doctor's office was surreal. There she was a real baby not just some tiny gummy bear. A tiny person with fingers and toes. I remember tearing up. All the news was good, she was healthy as expected and surprisingly I was holding up just fine and fibroid free. It was memorable, but nowhere near as exciting and emotionally charged as the second one.
We went to this place in called Ultra Babies. I was so excited I could barely sleep and even though I wanted a girl at this point I was beyond excited just to know. I also figured if it was a boy I already had an awesome name picked out. Michael, no matter what he says, was a ball of nerves. I've NEVER seen him so anxious before. He looked startled and pale as a ghost. When we arrived I was thoroughly impressed with how nice the place was. The waiting room looked like the lobby of a nice hotel. The women who worked there very efficiently checked us in and got us all a beverage. Then we sent Isaac off to the playroom, which he still talks about! We were in the smaller of the two ultrasound rooms and the cozy table and dim lighting made it feel very intimate. I remember her zooming around my belly with the wand and waiting for the baby to come into focus on the screen in front of us. All the sudden there she was moving and kicking like crazy (but I couldn't really feel it yet). After a little while the sonographer zoomed in on the area in question and concentrated for moment. She pointed an arrow on the screen at where we needed to look and then stood up with a huge grin and Vanna White style gestured to the screen. I'm pretty sure Michael and I were holding our breath and then after what felt like hours (in reality it was a few seconds) he asked "what is it?" and sonographer said “what does it look like?" He replied “is it…” to which she answered “a girl!" At that moment all the air returned to my lungs and Michael asked "how sure are you? Like as far percentage?" to which she laughed and said "110%"
It was wonderful. We had our girl. I was so excited I felt like I was going to jump out of my skin. My face started to ache from smiling. Michael and I held hands and stared at her for a bit. On the way home I insisted on ice cream, but as it was a Sunday afternoon nowhere was open. We went to Publix and got pink ice cream, cherry chocolate chip. We went home and quickly celebrated over pink ice cream with our last big secret of the pregnancy.
When Michael and I were first exploring the idea of a relationship (and I was trying to wrap my head around him having a child already) I asked if he wanted anymore kids. At that point his answer of "probably not" was met with relief on my end. After we'd been together a while we discussed the remote possibility of someday after we got married maybe having a baby Michael had said "I want us to have a little girl and I want her to look just like you."
We actually had two ultrasounds during the time when you can tell the gender, one at the doctor's office and a private one. The one at the doctor's office was surreal. There she was a real baby not just some tiny gummy bear. A tiny person with fingers and toes. I remember tearing up. All the news was good, she was healthy as expected and surprisingly I was holding up just fine and fibroid free. It was memorable, but nowhere near as exciting and emotionally charged as the second one.
We went to this place in called Ultra Babies. I was so excited I could barely sleep and even though I wanted a girl at this point I was beyond excited just to know. I also figured if it was a boy I already had an awesome name picked out. Michael, no matter what he says, was a ball of nerves. I've NEVER seen him so anxious before. He looked startled and pale as a ghost. When we arrived I was thoroughly impressed with how nice the place was. The waiting room looked like the lobby of a nice hotel. The women who worked there very efficiently checked us in and got us all a beverage. Then we sent Isaac off to the playroom, which he still talks about! We were in the smaller of the two ultrasound rooms and the cozy table and dim lighting made it feel very intimate. I remember her zooming around my belly with the wand and waiting for the baby to come into focus on the screen in front of us. All the sudden there she was moving and kicking like crazy (but I couldn't really feel it yet). After a little while the sonographer zoomed in on the area in question and concentrated for moment. She pointed an arrow on the screen at where we needed to look and then stood up with a huge grin and Vanna White style gestured to the screen. I'm pretty sure Michael and I were holding our breath and then after what felt like hours (in reality it was a few seconds) he asked "what is it?" and sonographer said “what does it look like?" He replied “is it…” to which she answered “a girl!" At that moment all the air returned to my lungs and Michael asked "how sure are you? Like as far percentage?" to which she laughed and said "110%"
It was wonderful. We had our girl. I was so excited I felt like I was going to jump out of my skin. My face started to ache from smiling. Michael and I held hands and stared at her for a bit. On the way home I insisted on ice cream, but as it was a Sunday afternoon nowhere was open. We went to Publix and got pink ice cream, cherry chocolate chip. We went home and quickly celebrated over pink ice cream with our last big secret of the pregnancy.
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