Negative Comments

Ok, so there's this thing that happens when you get pregnant, strangers completely forget their manners. Is there any other time a stranger would walk up to you and touch you? Don't think so. I'm not an elitist, I'm proud of the belly and my little kickboxer, but if we're not on a first name basis ask first. Or when would anyone comment on/criticize your weight? Seriously, just use some common sense when you comment on how much weight a hormonal pregnant lady has gained. Also, when else would someone comment on what you're eating? It seems to me during the pregnancy is the worst time to pick on someone's lunch. It's not the dark ages we all know what's safe and unsafe for the baby.
Beyond the obvious everyone's got advice. Which is hardest for me to take from childless friends, but sometimes equally annoying from people with kids. I'm the queen of research. I pick everyone's brain and welcome conversation, but there's a time and a place. Please do not tell me about your horrible miscarriage/still born child experiences I have plenty to worry about. If I ask you about your labor experience and it was bad no worries I'm prepared for bad when that's the topic. Aside from scary stuff there are some things that are conversational pieces of information not invitations for commentary. If you ask me what I'm thinking about for names you're welcome to tell me you don't care for my choice, but I don't want to hear a 20min speech about all the negative associations you have with it. If it sounds like or rhymes with a part of human anatomy or has a horrible nickname then it's your duty to point it out. If you have some memory of some pop culture incident, person who used to torture you or some such thing that I don't know about I don't need to know. My kid, my choice.
Speaking of choices, why do people care so much whether you give birth naturally, breast feed, go back to work, or stay at home with the baby? Those are personal, individual choices, but I guess they could be genuinely concerned (depending on level of familiarity). Then there's stupid stuff like the color of the nursery, going home from the hospital outfit, who's throwing/invited to the baby shower and so on. Why the hell do you care? If you do care why would you say so. The world will not end if I do it my way I'm sure of it.
But by far the worst is Michael's doom and gloom attitude about certain things. I know he had a kid before, but it wasn't with me. He warned me that breastfeeding was really hard and most women give up. Well, just because Mallory preferred to sleep than feed her child does not mean I'll be so easily deterred. Because first of all I care a hell of alot more than his ex did at 17yr old and my determination is legendary. So while I accept it may be hard to get started and I may need to supplement at first, but I will do it as much for me as the baby. Also, Mike was really annoying about the registry. Apparently he and Mallory went a little crazy with the scanner at Target the first go round which caused such an overwhelming amount of crap on the registry that they got very few necessities. Well, my game plan from the beginning was to do a little research find out what we had to have and find the best deals so no one was overwhelmed. I wanted comments on the registry so people would know which features were important to me and pick what they thought was best. I'm not exactly an impulsive shopaholic. I also find it ironic that Mr. “Don't add that $20 item someone will get it instead of something we really need” picked out the $119 high chair. Sigh.
He also went on and on about how awful the end of the pregnancy is. Well, I expect to be uncomfortable, irritable and sleep deprived at the end but don't want to focus on it. At this point it’s not likely I’ll get to 40 wks anyway. The newest thing he harps on about is how awful the first few months of the babies life can be. I'm no new comer to babies. I babysat up a storm in middle and high school. It's not easy. My cousin's little girl screamed for the first few months of her life no matter what they fed her and I lived through babysitting her. I know it's not the same as having your own newborn, but I'm just saying my expectations are not unrealistic. I pointed out that this baby is not Isaac, Mike’s not 19 anymore or raising this one on his own, and I'm not his ex. I prefer to think positive and know the worse case scenario exists.
Positive thoughts little one, keep cooking.